Shitty mindset flu

Jul 31, 2019

Four shitty mindset mistakes I’m making in my business right now
(But that I really don’t want YOU to make.)

Everyone has bad days. It’s a known caveat of this whole ‘life’ thing. But when bad days bleed into bloody horrible weeks, your chances of catching Shitty Mindset Flu skyrockets.

… Add in Mercury Retrograde* and you’re pretty much f*cked.

Or, at least, that’s been my attitude lately.

You see, my life hasn’t been one or two whoops-a-daisy’s; it’s been a never-ending series of unfortunate clusterfucks.

There was …

  • The apple of my eye – my beautiful Mac – dying on me … midway through a project.
  • Catching the fun duo act of glandular fever and pneumonia and being deathly sick for over a month.
  • The Internet mourning the loss of its Mac pal and dying in sympathy.
  • Important course content going MIA.
  • Website links and pages tagging along for the vanishing venture.
  • Asana taking $900 from my bank account. Unauthorised.
  • Emails disappearing from my inbox and failing to arrive at their destinations.
  • Breaking.

It just didn’t stop.
And sure, they’re all first world problems.

BUT … all those consistently crappy things made me plummet into shitty mindset hell. And it wasn’t like there was a cough drop I could suck for Shitty Mindset Flu. I was stuck with it … until I decided I wasn’t going to be stuck with it.

Mindset is such a huge battle when you’re a solopreneur and, gasp, even I’m not perfect at it.

But I’ve seen firsthand how a negative entrepreneur can self-combust and take their business down with them, and I refuse to let that happen to me.

So here I am, waging a war on my shitty mindset.
… Will you join me?

Maybe …

  • You’re blaming everyone and everything for the current crappiness in your life?
  • You hate your clients and dread checking your inbox?
  • Your business isn’t running how you’d like it to run and you’re resenting it?
  • You’re walking around with a resting bitch face and a cloud of irritation circling your head?

If this is you, don’t worry. It happens to the best of us.

But let’s inoculate ourselves and recover from the Shitty Mindset Flu before it lands us in an even crappier place.

Ready? Let’s go.

The four biggest mindset bugs infecting your biz

  1. The World Blamer Virus

How I caught it: This virus lingers in a place called Pity the Victim where I’ve been feeding it a never-ending stream of negativity while I moan things like, “the universe hates me” until I really, truly started to believe that what I was saying was the truth.

How to treat it: When I feel the World Blamer Virus taking hold, I counteract the stream of negativity with positivity instead. It’s like psychological vitamin C that helps me recover more quickly from my victim mentality.

This week, I was flooding my mind with thoughts of positive stuff like:

  • My podcast, The Uncool Designer, was featured in the “new & noteworthy” section of iTunes.
  • My current Design Biz Bootcamp students are killing it & I am so proud of them.
  • Oh, and my past bootcampers are making huge strides in their businesses & sending me emails that make my heart happy.
  • I did a logo design for the first time in three years & my client approved the first concept, zero changes.
  • I nailed (and actually enjoyed!) my book cover photoshoot.
  • I have an amazing new member of my team who makes life easier. Lisa Wallington, I heart you!
  • I took a fair chunk of time off in June/July for my birthday & holidays, how lucky am I to be able to do that?!

Homework: Have you been feeling negative about things in your business lately?
Grab a pen and paper and counteract every shitty thing that has happened with something awesome that has happened.

There is plenty of good stuff there, you just have to see it.

A better mindset: The universe loves you – there is good everywhere! 

  1. The Path Strayer Infection

How I caught it: I forgot what my idea of success is, and instead got caught up with what everyone else is doing. I fell in love with the idea that other people’s idea of busyness and success was better than mine and began drafting business plans based on what other people were doing.

How to treat it: I stopped looking around. I unfollowed people who trigger me. I put myself first and realigned with what my idea of success looks like. I will tell you a little secret … Recently after an intense Instagram scroll session, I got this idea in my head, “Why don’t I ever get invited to be a speaker?” Of course, my inner bitch got carried away and started sprouting crap like, “It’s because you’re fat, a fraud. No one likes or respects you”. What garbage – all of these negative thoughts were false. 

The real reason I have never been asked to be a speaker is:

  1. I don’t actually want to. Public speaking is on par with a flock of birds for me.
  2. I haven’t put it out there as something I want to do (because I don’t).

Basically I was feeling unworthy because someone succeeded at something that I don’t even want? Whoa, that’s a whole new level of mindset crazy.

So it is important to know what you want. Refuse to be influenced other people’s wins – because they are cool, but not necessarily your idea of success. 

Homework: Have you forgotten your why?
Download the SUCCESS SLAM workbook here & get clear on what your idea of success is (and ignore the rest).

A better mindset: I have my own clear path – nothing else matters. 

  1.  The Centre of the Universe Bug

How I caught it:  A few weeks back, I offered a special Christmas in July sale where I served up LOADS of value for under 100 bucks. I did this sale because I know so many of the ladies in the group are saving up so they can work with me, and this was an opportunity for them to make it happen. Happily, lots of people took up my offer … but there were a few who wanted to haggle and negotiate with me over content. 

I took it personally and questioned my offer, content and, after a particularly bad thinking sesh, myself.

How to treat it: Laugh, press delete & move on! I know that is easier said than done. But if I sat down and thought about how many courses I have sold over the last two years and then did the numbers on how many raving fans I have had in comparison to negative reviews it is obvious that I am killing it. I would say 98% of the feedback I have received has been positive, which is pretty remarkable. I also need to remember there will always be that 2% that push boundaries and it probably has nothing to with me! 

This goes for clients too. Don’t take what they say to heart, often it has very little to do with you. 

So it is time to pause and realise. Not everything is about me. I cannot please everyone, but I am loved & appreciated by many.

A better mindset – “Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” – The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

  1. The Isolation Incubator

How I caught it: I’m an introvert. I don’t get lonely; I thrive on being alone. Yet, over the last few weeks, I’ve felt really alone in my business. And when you feel alone, you feel misunderstood and drama drama drama. “No one cares,” I told myself. “I’m doing this alone.”

How to treat it: A reality check! Even though I created the idea that I was alone, I am far from it. In fact, all I have to do is REACH OUT and I could have someone to talk to right now. I have a supportive husband, a mum who does her best to listen to business stuff and a community of amazing Designer Boss-Ladies…. Oh and the best work-wife I could ask for (@cass lane).  I’m. So. Lucky.

A better mindset: You have the power to connect, just make the move.

Don’t forget to download your free SUCCESS SLAM workbook and discover what your version of success looks like!

*Wait, what is Mercury Retrograde? Basically, it’s like an astronomical lightning storm that messes with your electronics, organisation and world. Learn more about it here.

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